Fantasy Finals

Well everybody, here it is at last, the finals write up. For those of you who missed it, the game was well worth watching. These teams have a history and know each other well, so there was no early game "feeling the opponent out" phase that some games have. It was down to business from the first pull.

As each team warmed up, it looked like Flaming Moe 2004 was taking it a little more seriously. The CLX players were just throwing all kinds of useless throws and actually cheering when there were drops. Is this the state of competitive coed ultimate? Well, they paid for it. Flaming Moe won the flip and chose to pull to CLX, and their offense was not ready. Maybe I don't understand their game plan, but they might want to warm up a little more. They have an uncontested turnover and Moe quickly scores to make it 1-0. Moe rips a pull deep into CLX territory, and it takes them nearly 10 passes to get it out of Callahan range. The Moe defense is tight and layout abound. CLX throws a pass just out of reach of Savage and Moe picks it up to make it 2-0. CLX responds with a big huck to #99 Van Maanen. I guess when all else fails, put it to the mountain. Now on the board, CLX breathes easy, sends in a D line, and Versteeg gets a great poach D. Without wasting time, he picks up and throws a hammer/blade to Van Maanen. Now 2-2. Moe tries a huck, but CLX is there, and some great handling by #69 Cunningham gets the disc into the red zone and #21 Sheldahl scores for CLX, now on a three point run.

A lot of members from Hot Action 2004 and CLX 2005 are hanging out on the sidelines, beer in hand. They are a little hungover/drunk from last night. They start an impromptu chant "Monkeyfist. Monkeyfist. Monkeyfist." Their heckle has a profound impact on Moe and they rattle off three of their own. CLX is on their heels and looking unfocused. They are able to get back on track with a score, but Moe answers to make it 6-4. Chad moves it downfield again and put up a hospital pass. Luckily for CLX, they've been there before and make the grab. Another D by Voytas over Klink gives CLX the disc and a shot at tying the game. They take that opportunity and complete a #2 Karsten huck to #16 Meyer. Game tied 6-6. The teams trade points and Moe takes half 9-8, game to 17.

Moe receives to start the half, but #15 Walding gets a layout D on Moe's Moss. Staron tosses a score to Seiler to tie it at 9-9. Norgaard comes out hucking, though and Klink grabs a score over #1 Seiler, who's beggining to look like he's played too many points. The next point is a dogfight as many long turns occur for each team. Some layout D bids, unsuccessful O bids, and many overthrows. Moe finally connects, though and takes an 11-9 lead. CLX calmly answers with great offense from their "feminator" Derscheid/Savage duo. Why haven't they been using this before? CLX knows they need a big defense, but are unable to get it, as Moe takes a 12-10 lead. CLX runs the "feminator" again and again Moe's women just can't stop it. They do a great job of working the disc upfield before an endzone strike. 12-11. Norgaard tosses a 65-yard huck to Klink, though, as Moe has a good think working, too. 13-11. CLX suffers from a drop near midfield, and Moe puts one away to make it 14-11. On the CLX sideline, Bartel holds an orange Gatorade in one hand and a fruit punch Gatorade in the other, yet it is unknown what he is thinking about.

The Chad Larson Experience gets the disc and scores on a #2 Karsten huck to #1 Seiler. The D line plays harder than ever and switch to a straight up force to prevent the huck. It works, although Moe gets a huck off, it is not long and flat, but high and curving to avoid the mark. Gangel intercepts yet another pass intended for Klink. CLX works it upfield and scores to come within one at 13-14. A wave of confidence seems to be flowing through CLX 2004 now. Moe doesn't look sluggish though, and responds with deadly accuracy. A long throw for a score makes it 13-15. CLX scores quickly, using the lady duo again, with Camille Yu added in as a third handler. On the next point, Voytas gets an incredible layout defense, and Versteeg does what he does best, putting the disc in the endzone to Karsten. Tied at 15-15. Moe works with the calm demeanor they always have, but #12 Sheldahl blocks her lady and burns her for the score. "Double burn!" erupts from the sidelines. 16-15. To avoid overtime, CLX needs a score here. Moe again works the disc upfield but turns. CLX gives it back, but the D is too much and Moe tosses a disc out of bounds. #2 Karsten picks up a bends a forehand way out of bounds but it comes back in to a streaking #23 Gangel who leaps, catches, falls, toes the line, and is called in by the observer. CLX 2004 storms the field to congratulate each other on their 17-15 victory.

Post game interviews went like this:

CLX's Seiler: "Well, we were just living the dream out here. We're just a bunch of old Iowa Staters and randomly collected friends who weren't supposed to amount to anything as an ultimate team, but we never stopped believing in ourselves and were able to do it our way. I can't imagine a better way to win than with the players and friends you've played with all along."

Moe's Norgaard: Reporter asks whether the 2nd place finish is meaningful. "Second? Second! Any team out there can get second. What's the big deal about second? Look, me and six trained monkeys could get second. I wonder if they need a pickup anywhere? Well, we crapped the bed and now we have to sleep in it. We had that game, but instead we just squatted and crapped right there in our own bed."

CLX's Walding: "Wow, man. Like pops said, it's circular. It all comes around and goes around. Life is like the rim of the frisbee and we just grabbed it today. Look at these uniforms, too. I don't want to play in anything different."

CLX's Hill: "I guess it was fun and all, but I think I'm just going to go get hooked on Meth."

CLX's Savage: "The way we came back reminded me of playing in the '89 women's finals back when...wait, maybe that was '93 finals...no...was it '94 Worlds in Madison...well I can't remember. I do now have the ultimate "grand slam" with four different national and world titles, so I think I'll go pound some grand slams at Denny's. Whose with me?"

Hot Action 2004's Cram: "I should play with those guys. I can run around and huck to the endzone. In fact, I wonder if I can get people to say "cramming" instead of "hucking"."

Versteeg, Karsten, and Staron were unreachable for comment as they were apparently playing a game of hotbox somewhere.

CLX's Voytas: "I know we won, of course we were going to win. Did you guys have any doubt? C'mon man. Let's talk about something of importance, like Busch Light. You guys want to roll on some Busch Light tonight?"

Random Spectator: "Yeah, they were good, but did you see how Small those Packages were?"

Well, that about wraps it up. It was a great extended fantasy weekend here in fantasy world and fantasy finals are over. Who knows what kind of fantasy tournaments may take place in the future, but for now, CLX 2004 will remain fantasy champions.